Blog Similar to Carrie's, Because She's Smart Lady.

I would also like to have a blog posting my responses to things that I see/hear often. Also, as bias-less as possible, but you know how I can get.

Romney Hates Women

Incorrect. Romney just didn't want to force all women to have to have birth control in their health insurance, seeing as how that's unconstitutional. That does not mean that he's going to start making GOP tampons. Yes, he made a comment about stopping funding to Planned Parenthood, but look at it this way, we are $16,000,000,000,000 in debt (yes, that many zeroes), and no matter what gets cut, somebody's not going to like it. We're all going to have to take one for the team here. Now maybe Planned Parenthood shouldn't get cut, I don't really care on that one, but we need to understand that some things are going to have to get cut to save money.

Obama's Not Even Black

Bro. Yes he is. Not that that's an issue, or even a stinking factor, but just because your mom is white, doesn't mean you're magically not black.

I Didn't Vote, But...

Okay, if you were of age to vote and you knowingly did not register or even attempt to vote, you officially don't get to talk about it. Especially saying things like, "I was for Romney." No. You didn't vote when you could have, so you were not "for Romney".

Ps. Minors do get to have opinions. I think it's stupid when people say they don't. Obvs, they do. Some of them are even more educated than some of the people that do vote.

Ugghhhh, the Election's Over, STOP WITH THE POLITICS!

Politics are never over, bro. We are on the brink of war with Iran. Iran is on the brink of war with Israel. If we do one little thing to anger China, they could cash in all our debts, forcing a domino effect, and having countries all over go under. Congress doesn't stop meeting until the next election. The president doesn't stop working for 4 years. Politics keep happening. And as an intelligent citizen, it would do you well to keep up on them, so you can be informed, and maybe even write to your politicians so that they know what their people actually think.

Romney Hates Big Bird

Again, something's going to have to get cut. I'm a fan of IPTV, too, but maybe they are going to have to receive less funding to make it through this. Plus, as people who actually watch IPTV know, they have fundraisers of their own. Granted, this would not be enough, but they have been taking in money from non-governmental sources.

People Boycotting Places That Will Have to Cut Jobs Due to Obamacare

This is ridiculous. In case you haven't heard about this, Papa John's and a couple other places have said that with the rising costs of health care due to the new act, they're most likely going to have to cut jobs. Now, people are getting mad and saying they're going to boycott, because that's not fair.

Let's think about this. You want a minimum wage, right? You want this magnificent health care that's more expensive, right? Well, that means that they can't afford to pay as many people. And if you boycott their business, you are killing more jobs. If no one orders pizzas, they don't make money. If they don't make money, they have to cut spending. When they cut spending, they cut people. So to protest a business potentially (not even actually firing people yet) cutting jobs, you're going to assist them in making more drastic cuts? This in no way makes sense to me.

The Business About the 19 "Seceding" States

Let's just face the facts that this is not going to actually happen. The petitions are online, and open to pretty much anyone. Plus, I'm pretty sure the only state legally allowed to secede is Texas, and their petition has 60k signatures, I think, which is a not a whole lot of their population. Also, they're not linked to the state governments. These are just people who want to make a stand.

So some people think it's hilarious, and, "Oh, I'm seceding from my pants, I even signed a petition," blah blah. Some people think it's overreacting to the presidential election, which is probably a bit true. However, I tend to think good for them. At least they're trying to get the president's attention to tell him that they're pissed off. That's the first step, right? If your leaders know you're not happy, then they might actually try to fix what's bothering you. Now in the case of the petitions, I don't really know what their problem is, but depending on that, I totally support them. They probably won't start another civil war, but at least they're trying to get a point across!

Romney's Rich

Okay, this one I have a snarky comment for:

Heaven forbid we have someone in office who's good with money!

All Republicans Are Old, Rich, White Guys

Okay, I know a lot of Republicans, but I don't know any old, rich, white guys. Actually, I don't know any old rich any kind of guys. I don't know rich people. Anyway, that's just ridiculous. In the same way it's ridiculous to think that all Democrats are fat, lazy, and entitled. Now there could be a few people to fit both bills, but to assume that's what everyone is is ignorant. I am a young, poor, white girl, who is neither fat, nor (terribly) lazy. So what does that make me? A sheep?


In closing, thank you for not shooting me. I do hope I have not offended you. In which case I did, please direct all hate mail in a polite fashion towards the comment section. Thank you.

Getting more opinionated by the minute,
ChrissyJoy<3 p="p">

Dream log, night of November 3rd.

Last night I had fun dreams. The majority of it was at my church, and it was an estate auction for my grandpa Dittmer. But there was a ton of cool stuff! Like, okay, there was this huuuuuuge wagon there that my dad made. Solid wood, I think oak. But it was smooth as a baby's butt, and it was painted on these panels, and he had painted Lester's something Livestock something something across it and it was awesome. They told me it was the livestock trailer they used for their best animals. I kinda wish that thing was real. So then, my dad bought it because he made it, and there was this big black lady that was bossing people around with what to do with their stuff, so she helped me carry this trailer through the church and put it in dad's car. Luckily, it somehow morphed into a couple pieces of paper so this was possible.

And then celebrities started showing up. Apparently they advertised in LA for this, because, um, Christian Bale was there and told me he was living in a barn in Milo, and I was like omg you're Batman, let's be best friends, and then all the ladies from Desperate Housewives show up. That was totally intimidating. And Hannah Montana was there, except she had all of her hair and dignity still.

Then the entire thing became televised. Two random news anchors set up a studio in the sanctuary and started reporting play by play of what was happening. Cassidy didn't like their set. Mrs. McCombs didn't, either.

During this news report, the anchorlady showed videos of all the stuff she had done for stories, and most of them included boats or water. So then we were on the beach, and then we were bowling on a boat, and that was extremely difficult. You needed like a bowling caddy to make your ball actually go where it was supposed to.

That's pretty much it... It was pretty entertaining. Okay.

I still have weird dreams like I'm seven,
ChrissyJoy

Ignorance

So I'm in this one class that is primarily discussions about world issues.

I'm cool with that, I guess. It's totally weird, but I've learned a lot, including about people.

In that class, a third of your grade is participation. You all know I don't like getting bad grades. So naturally, I try to contribute every day.

However, the other people in this class aren't like me. These kids are primarily not from rural backgrounds. We are on completely separate pages. Not that they aren't smart! They're really smart. Like, they're engineers, and architects, and anthropologists, and all of this. They know about all kinds of engineering and energy things I have no idea about. But they have not a clue about rural life. Not a clue. So when I try to bring that opposite side of the table (which I frequently do, because that's what I know), they don't get it. I've been laughed at, told I was wrong, ignored, whatever. That is so... not normal for me. And it's frustrating, because I know I have good points sometimes, but since I am from a completely different place than most of these other people, they can't see it.

So frustrating.

Example: one day, our class was complaining about the food we have available to us. So I said that we have options, for instance, we could grow our own, like we do at home. The class told me that was not possible, because people have jobs and lives. The next week in class we watched a video on basically localizing food sources, and then they thought it was a great idea.

So I'm sitting there, like what the hell? Am I not clear? What? Why? Why is my thought process so different from that movie?

I don't get it. It bugs me. I reeeaally don't like feeling dumb. I just want to get into my niche and take classes that I like that make me excited about learning the content. I want to be around people who understand where I'm coming from and what I mean.

I'm not that damn intellectual. I want people to have common sense and a sense of normalcy. To me, upper-middle class, suburban, left wing, engineers are not normal. Not that they're bad, but seriously, there's more than that in the world. Most of us are blue collar, hard working, common sense, down to earth, middle class people.

People who know what silage is, and people who understand the necessity of GMO crops to a growing global population.

Seriously needing an agronomy class,
Chrissy Joy. <3 p="p">

Political rant. Surprise, surprise.

< rant >

Barak Obama: "Women are not an interest group. They are mothers, and daughters, and sisters, and wives. They are half of this country, and they are perfectly capable of making their own choices about their health."

This is a good quote. That is not why I am blogging. Why I am blogging, is that he states, CLEARLY, RIGHT THERE that women are capable of making their own decisions about their health.

THEN WHYYYYYYYYY DID YOU MANDATE CERTAIN BIRTH CONTROL OPTIONS THAT MANY WOMEN ARE STRONGLY AGAINST IN OBAMACARE? ARE THEY NOT CAPABLE OF DENYING IT? ONLY ACCEPTING IT? THIS IS NOT OKAY WITH ME.

Personally, I think all health care should be a-la-carte. Maybe I just want to cover heart and joint issues, because other than that I think I'm pretty much okay. That should be fine. But like, why does a nun need birth control? Why is/are she/we paying for that when she took a vow of celibacy? That's just stupid. Even if it's not violating her 1st amendment rights, which it is, which I won't get in to.

Also, the president of the United States of America should NOT be making hashtags like Romnesia like a 12 year old girl.

You're trying to run a country, not wear the same boy's jersey on Friday. Grow up.

</ rant >

This is another political rant you can ignore if you want. :)

Last night was the vice presidential debate. Sadly, I was at a meeting for most of it, so I didn't get to see a whole lot of it. However, from what I did get to see, Biden was the most rude debate candidate I have ever seen. Honestly, if I would have tried to do something like that in high school debate competition, I would have been disqualified. Kicked out. Game over, you lose. But now on twitter, all of these people ate it up! I don't get it! He interrupted, threw his hands in the air, laughed, never listened, complained to the mediator when Ryan used a good chunk of time, and then continued to use more time than he did. 

From the sampling I saw, the debate was a joke. You can't possibly portray your ideas when you're bitching each other out like Kevin and me. That's all it looked like. But I think that's a major issue in the entire political system these days.

Politics today are centered around hate.

95% of the commercials you see will be hate ads. Maybe even more. Actually, probably more. And you know what this causes? Our country hates each other; our country hates itself. This goes right on up to congress, where nothing gets accomplished, because people don't want to accidentally agree with somebody on the other side!

Well guess what, if anything's going to get done, we need compromise. We are too damn stubborn, and it is throwing the entire country down the toilet. It seems like what little does get discussed in office, doesn't get discussed well. And none of it really is compromise, because both parties have vowed not to sway, so they just wait until they have the most people in office. 

Then there's things like the Farm Bill. The Farm Bill covers so much stuff. It's really intense. I should read more on it, but I haven't yet. Anyway, the Farm Bill would take food stamps away from a large number of people. It would do a great number of things, but this is the most prevalent for congress, apparently. However, since everybody in congress is apparently only there for the paycheck, they put off discussing food stamps just to ensure they wouldn't piss anybody off and they could still have their job next year.

Excuse me for living, but I'm pretty sure that's not how you do a job.

If I went in to Wal-Mart to work one day, and I told my manager, "You know, I don't want to work register today, because I could bag somebody's stuff the way they don't like it, and I still want to come to work tomorrow. So I'm just going to sit in the lounge and eat all day," I'd get kicked in the ass, and told I was fired. That would ensure that I wouldn't have a job to come to tomorrow. So why is it that congress gets away with this?

Here's another major thing I have a problem with: presidential campaign funding. It has been proven that whoever spends the most money wins (I don't know the percents or stats or exceptions, but I heard the study on the radio). So really, all they're doing is buying votes. This is astronomical to me. Jimmy Carter gave a speech that was on IPTV a couple weeks ago, and he said this did not happen in the past. Back then, they only got to run off of the $2 or whatever checkoff on the taxes. When you only have that to work with, hate ads didn't get run. Hell, Nixon and JFK were golfing buddies, and they were on opposite sides of the party line. That's where we went wrong. We're now thriving in this culture of hatred, ignorance, intolerance, and stupidity. If you say something someone doesn't agree with, you're automatically a sick man and you get gifs made about you and fake twitter accounts and ridiculous memes with your face on them.

But think of what could happen. If we were honestly a civil culture who took time to understand concepts and debate them rationally. That energy that it took to make a gif could be spent advocating, reading, being involved, or discussing ideas. There is more to politics than who is right and who is wrong. It is about who we trust to run a country.

Our country.

My dream last night included an octopus.

Last night, I dreamt that Heidi and I were essentially wandering the countryside. Sometimes we had a car, sometimes we were walking.

And apparently I'm scared of octopi.

There was an octopus sitting on fence that I needed to cross. It was a big octopus, man, it was taking up the whole fence on that side. But the other side of the fence was all wired shut, so I needed that octopus off. So, naturally, I started swinging the fence violently until the octopus fell off.

Then it started crawling at me.

I freaked out. I ran out of there.

Scary land octopus.

And then there was something about like dead bodies or something... OH! There was a pediatrician who was pretty much dictating whatever we did in our little village or whatever.

They were a bad pediatrician.

They had these healing session type things when all of the kids in town had to be present. It was outside. It kind of reminds me of the Hunger Games in that aspect.

But every time that this practitioner did this healing ritual thing, a kid died. It was very sad. I cried.

But then the doctor thing changed from a lady to a man to a cross between Darth Maul and the Red Skull man.

Clearly there was a battle. There's almost always a battle in my dreams.

Then I woke up.

:)

Hungover Hipster Soda Jock Cash Register Man

My dream last night was pretty spotty. For part of it, I was in the Fresh Prince of Bel Air, except more ghetto, and Will Smith saw his mom's boob and that caused all sorts of mental problems. Then I ran off to a gas station somewheres and all of the people in there were dressed like it was freakin' 1957 or something. So I was like, meh, must be like an acting troupe or something. That or hipster. So I ask the guy at the cash register, "Do you guys have any, like, fruit cocktail kinds of things?"

Best part of the dream. Right here.

This guy. This. Guy. Fat. Beard. Wayfarer glasses. Hair combed all like John Travolta in Grease. Freakin' button up sweater, alright? Yeah. I'm leaning towards hipster, too.

Then he says, "Wait, I'm really hung over, what's a fruit cocktail? Oh, yeah! You want one of these?"

*gives me fruit by the foot*

I'm like LOL sure, kid.

Then I woke up. :)

I'm just going to start posting my dreams, because they're hilarious

Last night, I dreamt a few things. I don't remember how they fit together, so I'll just list them.

• James and I were watching a movie with his mom, and she yelled at us for goofing around.
• LL Cool J complimented me on my shirt. He called it ghetto. In a good way. We bonded. It was cool.
• We were actors in some movie, and Heidi was on the train car that caught fire. But it wasn't actually fire, so I wasn't sad.
• I kept finding baseballs. Weird ones. Like solid gold ones, and my dad's first home run one, and random stuff like that. Jason was going nuts.
• I got sprayed with insecticide.
• Dad retired the white pick-up.
• And James kept tickling me. What's new.

Having crazy dreams since '94,

ChrissyJoy

Politics.

Someone should probably disable my twitter when there's large masses of Democrats around before I tweet something I'll regret.

Okay. Let's say reasons I'm a republican.

I'm a republican because I believe in responsibility.

I'm a republican because I believe in free trade.

I'm a republican because I think the bigger the government is, the worse off the private sector is.

I'm a republican because I think that over-regulation was the downfall of this country.

I'm a republican because I believe in getting out of debt.

I'm a republican because I was raised to only take what I earn.

I'm a republican because I believe that anyone can turn their life around if they work hard and make a conscious effort to do so.

I'm a republican because I represent the 2nd amendment. Guns don't kill people. People kill people.

I'm a republican because I also represent the 1st amendment IN ITS ENTIRETY.

I'm a republican because when Obamacare went into effect, the health insurance for my sister and I went way up, and we were without care for weeks.

I'm a republican because I have common sense.

I'm a republican because I know how to work a budget and how to live on less that people think I do.

I'm a republican because I believe in America. The free America. Where people don't get hand-outs that don't ask for them, and where hard work is what makes you what you are.

I'm a republican because I've pulled a calf.

I'm a republican because I know how to dock hogs' tails.

I'm a republican because I know I can control who benefits from my hard work. (i.e.: my livestock, family, friends, FFA chapter, community, church, myself, etc.)

I'm a republican because I can think for myself. I support gay marriage, because marriage is a holy thing, and therefore should not be dictated by our government. It's a simple separation of church and state. (If a homosexual couple wants to get married and are not religious, well maybe there should be a separate state documentation equal to that of a marriage certificate.)

I'm a republican because I do not think it is okay to knowingly violate the beliefs of one of the oldest known religions in the world. (Mandatory birth control coverage for Catholics, using Quaker's tax dollars towards war efforts, etc.)

What really bothers me, is that people can't seem to understand this. When people can't wrap their mind around the fact that our Constitution is being shat upon, I become upset. When I become upset, I tweet, apparently.

I want people to understand the facts. I want THE GOVERNMENT to understand the facts.

"I believe in less need for charity, and more of it when needed."

That is a part of the FFA creed, and I would take it to court. More of it when needed. Not all of the time, not for everybody even when they don't want it, when needed. You know what that means to me? Go to Helping Hand. Go to the Salvation Army. Go to the Catholic Worker House. Go to your church, go to your neighbors, go to your God, whoever or wherever that may be. By all means, give to any and all of these places whenever you can, but, by God, if you make it mandatory to give to people that haven't asked me for it, if you make it mandatory to give me something when I didn't ask for it, I will be extremely irate.

But something else that bothers me; tax rates.

Flat rate makes the most sense. It does. Think about it. Ten percent of $32,000 is the same rate as ten percent of $250,000. The person with the income of $250,000 still pays way more than the person with $32,000, even if it's the same percent.

It's not like asking everybody in the world to pay $10 when some people have $2 and some people have $50. It's a rate.

Also, I heard a commercial saying that Romney wants to cut tax breaks.

Well yeah, he wants everybody to have the same rate, the way I understand it, so breaks would kind of take a dump on his system.

Obviously it's more complicated than that, and I'm sure multiple things have been said. However, the latest I heard (from the horse's mouth), is that Romney and Ryan want to have a flat rate tax for all incomes under a certain amount, and a different flat rate a little higher for the incomes over that.

If you keep in mind that it is a rate and not a dollar amount, I think this sounds like the most fair idea you could have.

Of course, that's just me.

I am a republican because I think it just makes sense to be.



Obviously dating a lawyer,
ChrissyJoy

This is my advice blog.

So so so often I see things, or read things, or whatever, and I just have this burning desire to tell the person little snippets of advice. Since you guys are the only ones who might take this well, I'm just going to write them all out. Take this as you will.

Quit trying so damn hard. Sucking your gut in does not make you look skinny. It makes it look like you're sucking your gut in. Same with sticking your boobs/butt out. Chill.

Don't, I mean do not ever, make yourself the victim. It's okay to be frustrated, upset, etc. But as soon as you make it look like you're the victim, people quit giving a flying fuck what happens to you.

Have some respect for yourself. If someone is treating you like shit, let them know that you will not take that! You are smarter, stronger, prettier, and better than that. Do not let someone treat you like less than you are.

Along those same lines, know what you deserve. If you're not good at something, don't act like you are. If you said something stupid, don't try to pass it off as smart. Own up to it and move on. You'll get more respect that way.

Dudebro, you need to work hard. You can never in your life expect people to give things to you. When your slacking catches up to you, no one but you is going to feel sorry for you. Fact.

Throwing copious amounts of money at useless expensive items is not cool. Knowing what you want/need and saving up for it accordingly is cool. Be smart with your money.

Hon, you need to learn how to punctuate. If you read a sentence that doesn't have any kind of commas or anything that leads on to something else it's just really confusing and it's like the voice in your head doesn't even know how to like read it and stuff you see the problem here ya use punctuation please.

It's okay to have dreams and goals, but you need to be realistic. Not so much cynical so you'll lose sight of your goal, but realistic. How are you going to pay for everything? Who will you depend on? What if something falls through? Is this dependable? Can I make this work? These are the kind of questions that are important to have answered. Having goals are good. They're awesome, actually. Just make sure your ass is covered before you jump.

Learn from your past. Seriously.

Learn from other people's mistakes.

Don't lie to yourself. The sooner you own up to everything, the sooner you can tackle it. Then you won't have to worry about it anymore. It's a lot easier than you think.

I'm not going to lie to you, throwing all your cards on the table when you talk to God is the best thing you could do if you're having problems. Don't bullshit him. Don't hide anything. Just let it go.

Second best thing to do if you're having problems: Pandora. That thing is the fucking shit.

Third best thing (but easily second best if you have a working car/drivers license): hanging out with real people. Just being around people makes you feel better. Talking about all your deep dark secrets with them is even better.

Last thing: people don't care if you're a whore, just be nice and don't talk about your escapades. And keep your herps away from people who don't want any.

That's all.

The girl who still has the mentality of the team mom,
Chrissy Joy♥

Gay marriage

We were talking about this today, and I decided to discuss this without people to argue with me and my (quite reasonable and thoroughly legit) ideas.

Well, I know I'm Catholic. Guess what, Catholics have a lot of rules. Some, I agree with. Some, I don't. The way I look at it, I am closer to God when I'm bawling my eyes out and screaming to Jesus in the car than I have ever felt in a church. If I can know my God, if I can really feel like I understand my religion, I feel like I can think for myself a little bit. As long as I understand where my church is coming from, I reserve the right to draw my own conclusions, do I not? 

That being said, I do like being Catholic. It's all I really know. Well, I know other religions, too, it's just that I understand Catholicism. I get where they're coming from. Yeah, we're kind of uptight, but that makes sense to me. Religion is honestly the biggest possible deal in the world, so for that reason I understand the crazy antics and hoops we jump through. That has shaped me into the person I have become. That has built my character in more ways than just religion.

But because I can think for myself, I do not see a problem with gay marriage.

One very very simple reason for me thinking this is the separation between church and state. Legally, laws are not made because of religion. The entire reason there are Europeans on this continent are because of religious freedom. It is ignorant to create laws against something for a religious belief. Not everyone in America has the same religious views, and it is disrespectful to impose one on everyone. 

Next, people make the case that every child deserves a mother and a father. However, there are major flaws in this argument. 1) Countless children are left motherless or fatherless or even both every single day. I do not see legislation being passed to outlaw that anytime soon. 2) There are hordes of incompetent parents all over. Drug addicts. Abusers. Sex offenders. Just plain stupid. There are also no laws against this, nor will there be.

On this same line, my cousin, Missy, married a woman a couple years ago, and Missy is probably one of the sweetest people I have ever met. I can guarantee that she would be an amazing mother, and so would her partner, if she is anything like her. They recently had a son, who I know will grow up with the same, if not better opportunities than other children in this country. I find it hard to blame, or even pass judgement on either one of these women. They are both smart, successful, competent people, and I wish them the very best.

As far as seeing gayness as a sin goes, I find this troublesome. I find it hard to accept the fact that God can punish someone for the way they love. Yes, there's also pedophilia, necrophilia, etc., but I see a clear line between these and being homosexual. A lot of people don't. Maybe I'm the one being ignorant here, it wouldn't be the first time. I simply cannot rationalize judging a gay person like that. To me, that's like judging someone because they're drawn to gingers or tall people or guys with mustaches. As long as no one is being hurt from it, I find no faults here.

That bothers me a bit, though, because the bible thumpin' Catholics say we should find fault in them. But is that really Christian? I mean, come one now! Let those without sin be the first to cast the stone! Acceptance, patience, love, isn't that what Jesus preached? Isn't that what they tell the kids in Sunday School, "God is love"? So if you're truly a Catholic, truly a Christian, would you not embrace the differences of your people? Would you not help them if they needed it? Would you not offer an arm to lean on while they face the slander of the outside world? Does that not mean that Christians should support gay marriage rather than shun it? That makes sense to me, at least.

Take this as you will, but that's just my thought process. I've known enough gay people to know they're just like other people, other than their sexual orientation. There's still good gay people. Because of this, I cannot merit making their decisions for them. 

That's just the way I think.

The potentially terrible Catholic,

Chrissy Joy♥

Polka dots and free speech

I keep learning things about myself, and I decided I'm just going to list them. To keep me thinking, if nothing else.

• I extremely hate the feel of powdery things. Flour, dust, cardboard on cardboard, fingernails on matte paint, anything like that. Aansdfkalhsdf. Makes my skin crawl.
• There are so many things I want to do with my life
• Travel the world
• Support myself with no worries (which most likely means playing it safe, which most likely means the majority of my goals are shit)
• Get married
• Have kids
• Be a great mom
• Be a great wife
• Be an awesome person
• Get cultured
• Have a better understanding of different places and ideas
• Be smarter
• Survive college
• Be famous
• Be normal
• Be a photojournalist for something that lets me travel
• Write a book
• Literally be a hobo/vagabond. I know that sounds crazy and stupid, but I do. I want to someday be rich enough that I can just take a debit card and a few cameras and travel Europe day by day. Maybe India and Asia while I'm out there.
• Make it as a photographer
• Be an auctioneer
• Teach somebody something that I'm good at without charging them anything
• Actually learn how to restore a car. Engine, paint job, interior, and all.
• Be smart enough to have a decent college fund for all of my kids
• LEARN HOW TO COOK SOMETHING BESIDES COOKIES AND MACARONI AND CHEESE
• I hate jokes about my personal life. Seriously hate. Hate hate hate. Hate. It's nobody else's business what the hell happens in my free time. Even if it's a joke. Pisses me off to no end.
• I hate when people underestimate the FFA. Instant piss-off-isfier.
• Disrespect is my biggest pet peeve.
• I always give people the benefit of the doubt, and 98% of the time, it's worth it.
• I am to the point in my high school career that I have given up on trying not to piss anyone off anymore.
• I need to write my teachers thank you notes, and I guarantee you I will cry more doing that than I did writing on senior pictures.
• This thought keeps creeping into my head that I am turning exactly into what I've always told myself I never would. That is seriously killing me. Things change?
• Lately I've been saying, "I think my number one fear is..." about everything I'm even kind of scared of.
• I've lost so much passion and drive to do photography lately. I sincerely hope that it's just a side effect of senioritis. If it isn't, I don't know what I'd do.
• I haven't found new music that I can really gel with lately. This is frustrating.
• I honestly don't give half of a shit about money. As long as I know I can survive without worries, I could care less. It's not like I can't wait to be uber rich or something.
• I've struggled my whole life, and I think a part of me wants me to struggle in the future, just because that's all I know how to do.
• I really don't think I understand how hard it is to be on my own.
• People keep telling me to get a job that I enjoy and that I'm good at. Well, I got writing, taking pictures, talking, and judging weeds and crops. Where the eff is that combo going to get me?
• I really want to play intramural volleyball. I think I will, actually. If I don't chicken out for fear of being shown up.
• Lack of responsibility is my second biggest pet peeve. I never understood how people can merit being unaccountable. Absolutely ridiculous.
• I seriously think that anyone who claims to have been cyber-bullied is a huge puss. Would you rather get a swirly? Same shit, different decade, bro!
• I hate confrontation more than I thought I did.
• Acceptance > cheese
• I say stupid things a lot. A freakin' lot. A whole hell of a freakin' lot.
• I'm almost there. I think.
• I both love structure and hate it with a fiery passion.

Thank you for visiting my crazy mess of emotions.

I WORKED SO HARD ON THIS ESSAY.

(first draft, btws)

The Importance of Agricultural Education

No, chicken wings do not grow back. No, chocolate milk does not come from chocolate cows. No, genetically modified organisms (GMOs) are not bad for you. Simple things such as these people have gotten confused. Our society has become so separated between the urban and rural districts that we have essentially forgotten how the other half lives. These misunderstandings are not harmless, however. They can breed a deep problem in the entire industry of agriculture. These misconceptions about the food industry produce a lack of productivity in the industry. Education is essential to solving this problem.

The first thing that people seem to forget is that farmers do have compassion in their souls, just like everyone else. When an agriculturalist goes out to work every day, they don’t do so with anger or malice; they are simply striving towards two main goals; to make a living, and to provide safe, affordable, and accessible food to the world. The best example towards the latter goal is a man named Norman Borlaug who devoted his life to genetically modifying crops. Through his studies he saved hundreds of millions of lives from starvation, and received the Nobel Peace Prize in 1970 for this work (Hesser vii). This way of thinking is even more pertinent today, with population expecting to grow to 9 billion by the year 2050 (Monsantoco). All of the changes farmers make in their production habits are to meet this need.

There are major misconceptions in the agriculture industry. Many of these are bred by a lack of understanding of the system. Organizations like PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) and HSUS (The Humane Society of the United States) add to these misunderstandings. For instance, PETA once posted an article attesting to the cruel and unhealthiness of cow’s milk (“Cow’s Milk: A Cruel and Unhealthy Product”). From reading this article, one would be lead to believe that farmers are uncaring towards their animals, and are perfectly fine with handing a tainted product over to the public. This could not be more incorrect. In contrast, Countryfarm Lifestyles posted an informative article attesting to the beneficial practices of milking cows, and how to do so with the care of the animal in mind ("Milking Cows and How To Get More Milk out of Your Dairy Cow with Good Feed and Care”). This article reflects the care and effort farmers put into their operations, and how seriously they take their product.

Another practice some people contend is the use of GMOs. Essentially, genetically modifying organisms yields the same result as cross-breeding, which has been a common practice for centuries. The definition of a GMO according to TheFreeDictionary.com is, “An organism whose genetic characteristics have been altered by the insertion of a modified gene or a gene from another organism using the techniques of genetic engineering” (“Genetically Modified Organism”). This practice has many benefits, including enhanced taste and quality, reduced maturation time, increased nutrients, yields, and stress tolerance, improved resistance to disease, pests, and herbicides, conservation of soil, water, and energy, and even increases food security for growing populations (“Genetically Modified Foods and Organisms”). That means that GMOs can feed more people more efficiently from less resources than ever before. This has saved millions of lives as we have seen with Norman Borlaug, and will continue to save lives as long as the research in this field continues.

The most controversial of the issues would have to be the meat portion of the industry. There have been many stories, articles, films, and books circulating about the ways animals are being raised. The most popular is a film entitled Food, Inc. This movie gives off the idea that all producers have something to hide, and that our food is not healthy (Food, Inc.). The first myth that Food, Inc. portrays is that the conventional way of farming (using GMOs and high production operations) is inhumane, as well as economically and environmentally unsustainable. The truth of this matter is that the evolution of farming has brought on changes that the 98% of the population who are not living on farms cannot understand (“Myths and Facts About Meat Production”). Dr. Nina Fedoroff, administrator for the Agency for International Development of Science and Technology, said about this, “We’ve gotten so good at growing food that we’ve gone, in a few generations, from nearly half of Americans living on farms to 2 percent. We no longer think about how the wonderful things in the grocery store got there, and we’d like to go back to what we think is a more natural way. But I’m afraid we can’t, in part, because there are just too many of us in this world. If everybody switched to organic farming, we couldn’t support the earth’s current population — maybe half,” (“Myths and Facts About Meat Production”).

This is not to say that organic, free range, and other various types of farming are not beneficial. All products, no matter how they were raised, are inspected and regulated for safety and quality to ensure the best possible product for the public. Non-conventional farming types may have other benefits, as well. In the documentary American Meat directed by Graham Meriwether, they investigate the realms of non-conventional types of farming and have found that many people prefer the taste of these products more than conventional (American Meat). There are ways of raising animals in different fashions that can self-sustain, are productive, and are very tasty (American Meat). However, these non-conventional operations can never hope to yield as great of a result as the conventional styles.

This brings in another complexity to the issue. There is no clear cut good or bad way to raise an animal between conventional and non-conventional styles. What we must look at instead are the benefits of both. Both operation types have strong places in today’s market, however conventionally raised meat is much cheaper. Why? Because when livestock are raised in a non-conventional way, there is less of a yield for each dollar put in. In short, raising animals in a non-conventional fashion is simply more expensive. This is not necessarily a bad thing, for diversities in the market are a good thing; they give people more options to choose what they wish to consume on the budget they have.

Nonetheless, many people do not understand these things, and it has caused turbulence in the agricultural industry. One large issue in the industry was a ballot proposition in California known as Prop 2 or Standards for Confining Farm Animals. The goal of this proposition was to mandate larger spaces for confined animals’ homes. This may have been a good step, however, mandating that buildings, stalls, and crate sized be increased could pose an expense that small family farms cannot afford. The major funder of the campaigning for Prop 2 was HSUS, donating over four million dollars; more than all of the major sponsors of the con-Prop 2 campaign combined (“California Proposition 2, Standards for Confining Farm Animals (2008)”). By putting the small family farms out of business, this proposition only added to the steam of major agribusinesses that they were hoping to unnecessarily target.

This is most certainly not the only farming aspect that has become over-regulated. Senator Roberts, a Republican from Kansas, has this to say about over-regulation, “As we think about EPA’s actions impacting agriculture, it is critical to recognize that no one cares more about maintaining a clean environment than the American farmer and rancher. They know firsthand that clean air and water and healthy soil go hand-in-hand with a healthy economy. Our producers deserve respect and appreciation from the EPA, not costly and redundant regulation,” (Agri-Pulse).

As you can see, there are many issues in the agriculture industry that have been brought on by a lack of understanding. This means that something needs to be addressed. Agriculture classes, tours, and resources need to be available to everyone. Too many schools have cut their agriculture programs in an effort to save money. Starting this education at a young age is beneficial on many levels; it brings diversity, a wider understanding, valuable skills, and many wonderful opportunities. What we need to solve a multitude of the industry’s issues are a new generation of educated, talented, driven producers as well as consumers, politicians, and members of society.

This means that every high school across the United States needs to have agriculture education. Every school, no matter rural, urban, or inner city, should have access to the knowledge and education about this massive industry that they deserve. They need to understand that agriculture is not just Bubba Ray up on his tractor planting corn. Agriculture is everything from the cotton in your clothes, to the food on your plate, to the soybean based foam in the seat of your car. As soon as this education is grounded and established, such an amazing understanding and appreciation will grow towards the producers.

Not only should students and youth have access to agricultural education resources, but adults have the right as well. Imagine the benefits of a local farmer coming into a suburb, city, or inner city community center or library to present their goals. Imagine how much the average adult could learn simply by conversing with such a farmer or agriculturalist. The rewards of a practice such as this would be astronomical.

But what can you do? First of all, contact your local school district and enlighten them to the many benefits of an agricultural program if they do not already have one. If they do, you can take action by supporting the local or state FFA Organization that promotes premier leadership, personal growth, and career success through agricultural education (National FFA Organization). To help your whole community, try to organize a town hall meeting with a local farmer. Maybe even just make an effort to attend your local farmer’s market and visit with the vendors. If you take strides to become more educated yourself, it’s amazing how many other lives you can benefit.

Essentially, what this society needs is a better understanding of the agricultural industry. Through in depth programs, classes, and organizations, our society can better themselves, as well as the industry that supports them. Education should not be a possibility, it should be standard. Encourage your community to expand their understandings. Contact your local schools and farmers. Set up meetings. Create informational brochures with a local agriculturalist. There are so many options, and all of them can help. Every bit helps. After all, everyone deserves to know why chicken wings don’t, in fact, grow back.

Works Cited

Agri-Pulse Staff. "Senator Roberts Blasts Federal Regulations 'damaging to Agriculture and Consumers' | AgriPulse." Agri-Pulse Communications Inc. Agri-Pulse, 2012. Web. 02 Apr. 2012. .

American Meat Institute. Myths and Facts About Meat Production. American Meat Institute, 2009. Safe Food Inc. American Meat Institute, 2009. Web. 8 Apr. 2012.

American Meat. Dir. Graham Meriwether. Perf. Steve Ells, Johnny Glosson and Tommy Glosson. 2010. DVD.

"California Proposition 2, Standards for Confining Farm Animals (2008)." Ballotpedia. 10 Feb. 2012. Web. 08 Apr. 2012. .

"Cow's Milk: A Cruel and Unhealthy Product." PETA: People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. PETA, 2012. Web. 2 Apr. 2012.

Food, Inc. Dir. Robert Kenner. Perf. Michael Pollan, Eric Schlosser and Richard Lobb. 2008. DVD.

"Genetically Modified Foods and Organisms" Oak Ridge National Laboratory. 5 Nov. 2008. Web. 07 Apr. 2012. .

"Genetically Modified Organism." TheFreeDictionary.com. Farlax, 2007. Web. 07 Apr. 2012. .

Hesser, Leon F. The Man Who Fed the World: Nobel Peace Prize Laureate Norman Borlaug and His Battle to End World Hunger : An Authorized Biography. Dallas, TX: Durban House Pub., 2006. Print.

"Milking Cows and How To Get More Milk out of Your Dairy Cow with Good Feed and Care." Milking Cows: Getting More Milk out of Your Dairy Cow With Good Feed and Care. Countryfarm Lifestyles, 2010. Web. 02 Apr. 2012. .

Monsantoco, Megan. "Ag Education: It's More Than Learning Where Chocolate Milk Comes From – Monsanto Blog - Beyond the Rows." Ag Education: It's More Than Learning Where Chocolate Milk Comes From – Monsanto Blog. Monsanto, 12 July 2010. Web. 25 Mar. 2012. .

National FFA Organization. "Mission and Motto." National FFA Organization; Agricultural Education. National FFA Organization, 2012. Web. 8 Apr. 2012.

[untitled]

I love this picture so much. I even edited it like a 12 year old. Except better, because ya know, I'm a stud.

:)
♥

Dear people who don't like guns,

Seriously bro, in our constitution of the United States of America we hold the right to bear arms. As long as we have that right (which should be as long as this is a country), we will damn right carry our guns. If it's licensed, encased, and all that good shit, it's fine.

And honestly, if someone wanted to kill somebody, they wouldn't need a gun. Think about it.

You can regulate the shit out of gun ownership, licensing, storing, carrying, and everything else, but two things will occur from this: 1) You will stomp on the constitution, and 2) People are still going to get shot. Even if they don't get shot, people are still going to get killed. Honestly, watch some television. On CSI one time, a kid died when he got hit in the head with a flashlight. Shit's gonna happen.

Also, if you're afraid of everyone walking around armed, think about the 1880's. The country survived, didn't it? Those guys had guns on them all the time. Not to mention the mother of pearl handle baby revolvers the women carried around.

But if you're afraid of other people having guns, why not get yourself one? Obviously you're just feeling unsafe and insecure, so you might as well fix that problem and see how you like it. Maybe then you'll understand that it's not all lunatics that carry/have weapons like this.

It can be a safety thing, a hunting thing, a work thing, or a just wanting to exercise your rights thing. It's not only a wanting to kill somebody thing.

Guns wouldn't hurt anybody if people weren't so damn crazy.

Try banning idiots and see how far that gets ya.

GRAMMAR LESSON.

1. Then: past. Back then...
2. Than: other. Other than...
3. D E F I N I T E L Y
4. T O M O R R O W
5. Y E S T E R D A Y
6. Shoulda = should've = should have. NOT should of. Same for could've, would've, etc. EXCEPTION: kinda. That is kind of, not kind have.
7. Your: possessive. Your dog, your cat, your grandma's pet owl.
8. You're: you are. You're a freaking idiot because you do not understand this.
9. Its: possessive. Its collar is nice.
10. It's: it is. It's not cool that you ignore the squiggly lines under the words you type.
11. When punctuating, there aren't random spaces before/after periods, exclamation points, and question marks. This is how you punctuate. Not this ! Or this.No. Like this. Questions? That is why we have a comment box.
12. A LOT
13. It's HIGH-PERR-BO-LEE. Not HYPER-BOWL.
14. Their: possessive. Their camper smells like a cat died while eating Mexican food.
15. There: place. It's over there, get it yourself, ya lazy piece o' crap.
16. They're: they are. They're all so stupid. Lord help their stupid souls.
17. G R A N T E D. People take things for granted, not for granite. Granite is a type of rock. Holy cow.
18. Y O U. Not U. Not yew. Not yoo.
19. Only add apostrophes when a) it's possessive, or b) it's a conjunction. Does it own something? Are you squishing two words together? If not, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, STOP.
20. Two, too, to. If you don't know the difference, just go ahead and call in sick from life until you do. (Two = 2. Too = also or exaggeration, ie: too much, too many, too strong. To = everything else.)
21. That means it's "me, too" not "me, two."
22. Capitalized letters are only for words at the beginning of sentences and proper nouns.
23. W H O A
24. O H
25. M O U S T A C H E or M U S T A C H E. Both are acceptable.
26. F A S C I N A T I O N
27. B A C O N
28. J U S T
29. D A M N
30. Who's: who is. Who's understanding this right now?
31. Whose: possessive. Whose is this lovely purple pen? I would love to borrow it.
32. It's a wheelbarrow. Not a wheelbarrel.
33. O F F I C I A L L Y
34. If you're addressing a person, put a comma to separate the name from the rest of the sentence. Blah blah blah, Carl, blah blah. or Carl, blah blah blah. or BLAHBLAH BLAH blahdiddy blah blah, Carl!
35. Things like okay, too, though, however, weird little interjections like that need commas around them. Generally they'll be at the beginning or end of a sentence, so that's good, but yeah, use those. Also, like any time you would pause, or take a breath in a sentence, that needs a comma. Notice my amazing usage right now.
36. And lists! How could I forget lists! Technically there's two different ways to comma a list, but this is the best way: I want Hawaiian pizza, Chinese food, chocolate covered peeps, beef sticks, and some Sunny D for supper. DOES THAT MAKE SENSE TO YOU?
37. Supper: eats. Super: awesome. Supper is twice as super.
38. Dinner: eats. Diner: place to eat.
39. Dessert: nummies. Desert: hot place. Dessert is twice as good as the desert... or something like that.
40. Months and days of the week are capitalized.
41. Capitol: the building.
42. Capital: the letters, the punishment, the city, money, the assets, etc.
43. Whether: whether or not you should do blah blah blah
44. Wether: castrated male sheep
45. Bored: nothing to do
46. Board: wooden plank
47. Boared: NOT A WORD.
48. B E L I E V E
49. G O R G E O U S
50. "This is how you write a quote," said Chrissy, "because if you do it wrong, you'll look like a dumbass."

And this has been 50 things you need to work on, with Chrissy Dittmer!

Stupidity.

you may shoot me with your words

you may cut me with your eyes

you may kill me with your hatefulness

but still, like air, I'll rise

Some things I do have to do all by myself.

And I will.

And I do.

And I'll make it.

Because I ain't never not made it before.

Dude, this poem is the bawsest.

The Edge is where I want to be

By Lisa Martinovic

so you just want to take the edge off
one beer
one joint
one teeny weeny Prozac

get rid of the edge?

the edge is what Columbus sailed straight into
it’s the launching pad for every space shuttle
the edge is Eve contemplating the apple

and what’s life without an edge?
guess what, it’s DULL
the edge is the cliff you’ve dangled from in a hundred nightmares
you never know what’s over that edge
and there’s only one way to find out

Brothers and sisters
where are we—
who are we—
if we take the edge off?

Lose the edge
and all you’ve got is middle
middle aged
middle class
middle of the road
middle management

you’re dribbling along in the uncooked vanilla pudding of life
all fat
no lean, hard edge to drive you
sharpen your skills
your wit
your senses

the edge holds the answer to your questions
the question to your answers
it’s the trailhead to the road not taken
the edge is everywhere
you’ve never dared to be

baby, if you’re not on the edge
you’re sleepwalking through been there done that
you’re stuck watching reruns of somebody else’s life
in the great mushy middle
where all the droning, moaning masses live
and eat and act and dress and think alike
and see the same movies
so they can have the same conversations and then
dream the same dreams
if they dream at all

on the edge you don’t know
what anybody is going to do or say or think
the edge is not available on your cell phone, iPod, satellite dish
or anywhere in the googleable universe
the edge does not twitter, it THUNDERS

and there are no disguises here
on the edge, everyone is naked
all bets are off
and the game’s not rigged
the air is clear and brisk
your heart’s pounding
you’re shaking
you’re lightheaded and queasy
you’re scared
because everything is initiation
on that sharp unforgiving edge

damn right it’s uncomfortable
the edge is change!
it’s what you don’t see coming
so get out of your comfort zone and deal with it!

sure, the middle’s safe
it’s safe like hot cocoa, life jackets and training wheels
if that’s how you want to live
if you don’t ever want to break the rules
take risks
grow up
past your precious fears and life-strangling limitations

if you want to spend your life
drinking lite beer
smoking another joint
eating what’s put in front of you
and home entertaining yourself
till you suffocate on the vacuous paucity of your miserably crippled existence
then go ahead—have a virtual life

but if you’re tired and weary and battered
if you can’t take one more asshole
riding herd on your wild and precious life
if you’re mad or sad or bored enough
to wake up and do something
if you’re ready to feel the pain of the great
gaping wound your life has become
then goddamn it, friend!

quit your job
quit smoking
quit whining
leave that jerk
write that poem
go dancing
get sober
take a road trip—a dare—a spin—a lover—a chance
honey, break down and cry if that’s what it takes
then pick your ass up
and for all you’re worth run
don’t walk
to the edge

Potato juice.

I am strong, dammit.

When I am right, I will stand up for it.

When I'm wrong, I'll admit it. Or at least try to. I'm not amazing at that.

I will work.

I go out of my way.

I do more manual labor than most guys here at school.

Why the hell do you think I'm built like a silo?

I EARNED every bit of this muscle. So yeah, I'll walk like I own it, because I do, dammit!

And I am smart, dammit.

I came home from midterms with straight fucking A's when I was juggling FFA, NHS, basketball, art club, academic bowl, Spanish club, speech, ROCKSTARS, student council, and JOOI, not to mention a job, boyfriend, and social life. That means I'm freaking good at school.

I work hard to get my stuff done.

Not just out of the need to learn, but out of respect for my teachers who are spending their own time and money to get me somewhere.

I got a 26 on the ACT without studying. Not bragging, just fact. Pretty sure that means I'm decently smart. Not overly, but decently.

I have character, dammit.

I do things for the right reasons.

I stand up for what I believe is right.

I stand up for myself and my friends.

And sometimes even people I don't give a shit about!

Why? Because I am a good fucking person, and I try. I actually don't want to go to Hell, so I try to be someone I would be proud of.

All the cool/nice/unnecessary things I have I bought myself. Paid for myself. Saved up for myself. Worked for myself.

The grades I come home with I worked for myself. Put the time in for myself. Earned myself.

The character I'm working on getting, I work for every day. Read about every day. Think about every day. Pray about every day.

Am I a saint? I sure as hell am not. Never will be.

What I am is someone I would want to be.

Strong.

Smart.

Independent.

Hardworking.

Responsible.

Respectful.

And I am proud of myself.

If you take that as a cocky, arrogant, egotistical, thinks-she-owns-the-place "cunt", good for you.

I'm better than that.

Or at least I'm trying to be.

Travel bug.

So there's this video on youtube called A strange place in the desert. It's freakin' amazing.

It's about this ghost town that was a boom town back in the '50s. I don't feel like explaining it all, but here's the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YrND-3LnlV0

I highly recommend it.

Anyway, it gave me the travel bug again.

I want to go out there sooooo badly, I can feel it in my gut. I want to get out and travel. I want to see everything. I mean everything. I want to document it all. I want to just take as much time and money as it takes, and drop everything else to go and experience everything the world has to offer.

I cannot bear the thought of dying without seeing half of the world.

My fear is that I'll put it off because of money, then put it off because of a guy, and put it off because of my family, then put it off because of my kids, and then waking up one day old as the hills and it's too late.

I don't want to blow this.

I want to be a gypsy about this.

I would love nothing more than to hippy the shit out of this and just go and see and do.

I need to plan more, though. I can't just take off with no food or money and just expect everything to be okay, no matter how much I want to.

I just want to get a van. A Volkswagen van. One of those hippy style ones. Paint it up right. Get a backpack with enough clothes to survive. Grab my camera. Take my beau, and just go. Drive. And then when I hit a coast, fly. I would say boat, but that takes far too long. I want to see all of Europe. And Asia. And the middle east. I want to explore Australia. I want to see South America. I want to go to Africa. Hell, I want to go to Hawaii!

But I'm afraid I'll never get to for a chain of stupid reasons.

If I could live on dreams and a camera...

I want to write.

I feel like typing, but I don't really have anything good or interesting to talk about, so I'm just going to state random facts about myself.

I think that's self absorbed enough for a blog entry, right? Good deal, leggo.

• I love chocolate ice cream, and every night my sister is home we stay up late, tell corny jokes, stories, and eat a ton of it. Best bonding time ever.
• Hawaii Five-0 is the best cop show ever. Followed by The Mentalist and NCIS. <3
• My favorite show in the history of time is The Rifleman. It's an old western.
• I hate change.
• I hate having my fingernails unpainted and my hair too long, but they both grow too fast and I can't keep up. Plus haircuts are ridiculously expensive. Boo.
• I hate having to pick between homework and scholarships, therefore I end up not doing either half of the time. Hence blog.
• Before I started talking to James, I probably got a total of three texts a week. If that.
• My class ring gets too big when it's cold outside.
• I don't mind glittery things, but I haaaaate when glitter gets on my skin. Grosses me out.
• Blood. Is. Disgusting.
• My feet are sick.
• I have a folder devoted to speech.
• I have a folder devoted to scholarships.
• Both folders are pretty worn out.
• My phone isn't a smart phone. It's a touch phone. No internet, just a couple pre-set apps. No app store. And I bought it myself. It's really not that cool.
• I always have 2 hair things on my wrist, and I usually have a hair bra, too.
• Science and math are my two least favorite subjects.
• I love painting things.
• I love taking electronics and machinery apart. Grease, shit, and mud don't bother me at all.
• My friends and me talk about poop and periods too much.
• I have axillary hyperhidrosis. Not treated for it, but it's legit. My armpits are a faucet. Omg.
• I probably have too many pairs of shoes, but it always seems like I can never find a pair that fits my outfit.
• I can be greedy and take things for granted, but when I realize that it makes me sad.
• It's difficult to find the balance between being the girl-next-door-sweetheart and the strong-independent-don't-take-no-shit-woman.
• Life is rough.
• I'm proud of my scars. Especially my tractor tire burns.
• I'm shaped like a pear. Whooo for birthin' hips.
• After I started talking to James, I completely quit giving a shit about what anyone else thinks about how I look. Confidence, check.
• I love reading novels about magic and weird shit like that.
• I love museums.
• I love antique shops.
• I loooove auctions.
• Movies make my day better. Even if it's a shitty movie.
• Art can move your soul. Legit. That ain't hippy shit.
• A good pair of heels can magnify your swag by 235,907,234 x.
• I'm not a huge fan of my birthstone. Ruby, meh. I'd be a terrible pirate.
• I don't like pearls, either. But I wish I did. If I did like them, I'd wear them like they did in the '50s. Classy.
• I refuse to boss my boyfriend around.
• I refuse to drag my boyfriend to a chick flick.
• I would braid my hair more if my layers didn't always fall out of it.
• My hair is neither curly nor straight. Wave central right heah.
• My eyelashes are huge, and I'm still addicted to my falsies mascara. I freakin' love it.
• Chapstick is amazing.
• I'm always dehydrated.
• When I'm tan, like really tan, my skin color could pass for a Latina. Easy.
• Cassidy is my exact opposite, yet we're supa tight.
• I wish I had more close friends than I do.
• I don't like it when people hate on other people that I don't mind.
• It's easy for me to be a bitch about something I really care about. Hem, FFA, hem.
• I want everything done right. Therefore I feel the need to do everything myself. Therefore always busy.
• I believe in taking responsibility.
• I believe in promises.
• I believe in respect.
• I believe in a better future.
• I believe in a complete no bull shit policy. Even if that's hard for me sometimes.
• I believe in being a better person.
• I believe that God loves us, even if we're all shitty people. I believe he forgives our sins as long as we know we did wrong and try to do better.
• I never bullshit God. I cuss when I pray. I tell him like it is and I hope he doesn't mind. How can he trust me when he knows I'm not real with him?
• 89% of the time when I pray, I'm asking for something. It makes me feel bad. Like He hasn't done enough for me already, and I'll always want more.
• I'm afraid the real world will break me.
• The world is huge, and part of me thinks it's awesome and wants to explore it all, and part of me finds it terrifying and wants to go sit in a hole.
• My favorite color changes seasonally. Sometimes more.
• I am a dog person.
• I can eat an entire family sized bag of sour cream and onion potato chips by myself while watching one movie. Just ask Alex.
• I'm afraid of getting fat and having heart problems because of it. Family deal.
• Volleyball shot my knees to hell. I'll probably have to get them replaced before I turn 50.
• I really enjoy scrapbooking. Yep, I'm secretly 30.
• I also think kitchen utensils are cute. Seriously, I love looking at cute new spatulas and junk.
• I use Google Chrome.
• I'm afraid that journalism really isn't my fit. Really scared. I feel like I would much rather be a mechanic, photographer, auctioneer, but I doubt I could make a living off those. Even together.
• My bucket list is insane. Ly awesome.
• I have a book devoted to all of the lists of things I need to do, see, read, watch, or experience before I die.
• I have way too many can koozies. And I don't even drink.
• I love listening to music I've never heard before.
• Photography is my passion.
• I miss volleyball like crazy and I get choked up every time I think about it.
• I. Will. Make. It. To. All State. In. Individuals. I have to.
• Procrastinatorrr~~~
• My laugh is obnoxious, but I love it.
• I write things I need to do on my hand. I can lose a paper, I can't lose my hand.
• Every day I write in my planner. Someday I can look back and see what I did on January 5th 2012 and give a shit. Maybe my kids will think it's cool, I don't know.
• My grandpa (Papa) died November 28, 2005 and 11:30 pm from lung cancer. He had malignant tumors on his voice box and another in his brain. At the end he had seizures, and that's finally what did him in. It was because he smoked Winstons from the time he was 15 until he was 57 ish. He was the best grandpa I could have asked for. I love him so much, and I miss him like crazy. Every day. ♥
• My other grandpa, Grandpa Dittmer died of Parkinson's in 2002. I was always afraid of him, for some reason, which was stupid. I wish I would have known him better.
• Grandma Dittmer was a saint. Sweetest woman I have ever met. She had 9 kids, one that died as a kid. One of 7 girls I think. She had 30 grand kids, and knew and loved every single one of us. She was up in her 90's when she died, and that was just because it was her time. She was all used up by the time Jesus called her. I know she's up in heaven. If she's not there, the rest of the world is straight up fucked.
• I'm afraid my dad won't get to walk me down the aisle.
• Some asshole I don't know told me one time that my dad will never see my kids, and that thought has been in my head ever since.
• After this year, I won't be taking violin lessons anymore, and I couldn't be more excited about this. Seven year old me is pissing her pants with happy right meow.
• I say right meow a lot.
• I say bro a lot.
• And bruh.
• And dude.
• And broski.
• And dudebro.
• And occasionally dudebroski.
• My iPod has everything from Seether to Glenn Miller and everything in between. Except classical and metal. Everything else in between.
• 98.7 KMGO is my station.
• I have never won a trophy.
• I've only won one medal. And that was in an academic bowl.
• Winnie the Pooh is my favorite cartoon character.
• Mulan is my hero. Still.
• People like MLK Jr., Sojourner Truth, Maya Angelou, Catherine the Great, Katharine Hepburn, and Ghandi inspire me to do better. If they could, I can.
• I don't disrespect presidents. I may not like one, but I know they all do what they think is best. You can't ask more than that.
• I go to church every week. It's one hour. It's good for ya.
• I'm always afraid of offending people.
• I doubt you've read down this far.
• For some reason, I find this horribly fun. Narcissistic much?
• HARRY POTTER♥
• I never want to lose contact with my friends. Especially the ones with big plans that I've had their land-line memorized since I was 7.
• My best friend, Alejandra "BA" JoLynn Sudbrock makes the best damn toast in the world.
• I miss playing bari sax.
• I feel like I'm cheating on iTunes with Spotify...
• I have facebook, myspace, twitter, pinterest, tumblr, blogger, flickr, and a Walgreens account. Omg.
• Tagalongs are the best girl scout cookies.
• I still don't get why my boyfriend likes me. He's clearly the cooler one of us.
• I need to take a math quiz.

Okay, I'm done now.

Thanks.

Bye.♥

Surely.

I'm stressed out and I feel like I'm drowning in shit I have to do, so of course it's necessary for me to waste a good ten minutes ranting my brains out.

Enjoy.

Things I need to do:

• Iowa Degree
• Scholarships
• Recruit people for JOOI
• Get dues from people for JOOI
• Write my after dinner speech
• Research more for my lit program
• Really buckle down on improv
• Make up 21 delinquent cross courts (soon to be probably 37)
• Tell Dirkx not to mail a letter I told him to write yesterday (I'll get to that story)
• Memorize my solo for festival
• Do my physics
• Do my chemistry
• Actually read Frankenstein instead of bullshitting my way through evverrryyythhiiiiiinngg
• Turn in money for my speech shirt
• See if Galvin finished his bit for my NHS scholarship
• Get all over my parents' asses about getting FAFSA done so I can quit missing scholarship deadlines for that
• Clean the church
• Work ahead in comp
• Work ahead in math
• Work on my photography!

Seriously, I haven't TOUCHED my pictures since Christmas. I just now uploaded all the pictures I had on my camera since 12/31, which was 443, BY the way. What the french, I mean, last year, I couldn't go TWO WEEKS without going through picture withdrawal and doing SOMETHING. Where the fuck did that go? Now I have a brand new lens and I'm too busy all the time to use it, PLUS, omg this is the best part, picnik premium is now FREE and is going out of business in April, and I have edited NOTHING since I heard this. WTF IS THE MATTER WITH ME? If I'm really too busy to follow my passion, I have my priorities severely fucked up someplace. And it hurts when I see people have these opportunities with their photography that I never get. I want that. Not that I have time for that, but I want the offer. I want somebody to come up to me and say, "Hey, Chriss, we should go on a photo shoot next weekend. I think you'd do a good job." I want to get somewhere with this, and if I really want that, I should be way far ahead of where I am now.

I'm fucking drowning.

Homework, clubs, sport (singular. omg.), responsibilities, job, friends, and not to mention my boyfriend that I'd rather just watch Jackass with than do half of that other shit I'm supposed to do.

Not saying that I'm that girl that wants/does blow off everything else just to see her beau; I'm so not.

We both have lives, friends, family, responsibilities, and we both understand that.

It's just nice to hang out when you only get the chance to see each other once a week. That's a fact, and that you can't argue.

But anyway, that's the least of my worries right now, that's actually quite awesome. Scholarships are scaring the piss out of me.

I'm broke as a joke.

There's no way I can afford college.

I'm afraid that even after I get loans there's no way to pay for it, and then I'll have loans plus interest to pay off. And THEN my parents go and FORGET to put a scholarship in the mail, so now that one's out of the question. That pushed me over the edge. I freaked the fuck out. My dad told me to mail it anyway, like because I'm such a fuckin' damn saint that they'd ignore the tardiness and take it anyway. Yeah, bro, the whole world doesn't revolve around the fucking Dittmers anymore! You're not hot shit anymore! You haven't been since the '80s! WHICH, by the way, was the last time you bothered to upgrade any of your shit around here!

Wow, I should not get into that on the internet.

Anywhooooo, I need to:

• Delegate
• Make lists like a boss (so far so good)
• Manage my time like a bamf
• Shut the fuck up and get my shit done

Yep, I think that pretty much sums it up.

Now I'm gonna go ham on some pictures I've been neglecting.

Why?

Because I'm clearly a dumbass.

The girl who likes to complain and worry and stress way too much,
ChrissyJoy♥