Somnia squared.

So much for making this quick.

I just read Carrie Berry and Matt Davis's blogs.

IIIIII cried.

Mmmmhmm. Yup. True story.

Why? Well, let's see. In one year, Carrie and me will be going off to two completely separate lives. Complete with different cities, schools, people, friends, boyfriends, churches, sports, teams, inside jokes, and drinking buddies. And in one year, Matt Davis and his graduating class will have been on their fast track to greatness for an entire year while I'm still sitting out physics in Mrs. Kelso's class.

I fucking hate growing up.

I love my class. Really, I do. Some of them sincerely need to pull their head out of their ass, but I still love them.

I wish I knew them better.

I wish I hung out with them more.

I wish they knew that I would literally do anything for them.

I'm not kidding.

Anything.

I wish I never had to leave their sides.

Because, honestly, as much as they may think they need me to supply homework and tampons, I need them needing me more.

The real world ain't like this fishbowl town.

It's a whole damn ocean out there, and this little goldfish don't know how to handle all them sharks.

I'm exactly the type of girl who ends up goin to college and being the party girl.

Just living in her high school ways.

Doesn't know how not to be smiled at by everyone.

I'll be that wrinkly nasty ass you see at wal mart who thinks they're still as hot shit as they were back in high school.

Not that I wanna be, I just fit the MO.

Don't wanna leave.

Don't know how to leave.

Living in the past even though I haven't even made a past yet.

How pathetic is that?



Sincerely,
Thegirlwho'salreadystuckinayearthathasn'thappenedyet,
Chrissy Dittmer.